


The Ticking of a Stopped Clock

by ElizaXSpears



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Angst, Death, Dreams, Horrorish, M/M, Romanceish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-28
Updated: 2015-03-28
Packaged: 2018-03-20 00:50:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3630507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElizaXSpears/pseuds/ElizaXSpears
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mourning for a loved one always makes time leave you behind</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Ticking of a Stopped Clock

Dreams were nightmares to him. They gave him a couple of hours of rest from his tears only for them to end and force him to live in the hell called reality. He wanted his dreams to last forever, the only place where he felt like smiling wasn’t a guilty action, where he just felt like he could be happy. Then again, what was a dream? They were made up from his inner emotions to give him what he desired then take it all away from him. It made him irritable and his glare he gave everyone even made William bit unsettled which made the supervisor make any conversation they had short and sweet which Eric was glad about. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, to vocalize his feelings and bollocks to anyone that said talking helped ease the ache of his heart. Talking couldn’t make him forget or bring back the dead.

Then again, some did ask, when they had the courage, why was he so angry when it was inevitable anyway? They all knew it was going to happen, even the sick reaper himself. Eric just flipped them off and shoved them out of his way. His emotions ran high and only when he was alone in his locked office would he hold a photo of his partner and cry. He knew he was bound to die, yes, but no one had quite known the affect Alan’s thorns had on Eric. Seeing Alan cry out in agony every time an attack tore through him, feeling Alan’s fingers dig into his arms, his shoulders, neck, any part he was gripping to, made Eric just wish he could share Alan’s pain, even if it was just a fraction of what Alan was feeling. Eric was even stupid enough to try and get Alan’s illness but Grell and Ronald always yanked him back, reminding him how Alan had told them all to live on without him, just to never forget him. To Eric, living without Alan was more painful than being forgotten would be to Alan.

When night did come around, it was the only time Eric felt any other emotion other than anger and sorrow. He was excited to see where Alan would bring them tonight, but as he fell asleep, he could already tell something was wrong. The dark in his room seemed thicker for some reason; he knew whey when he ended up in his dreamland. The place Alan had decided to bring them was the darkness he was staring at as he fell asleep. There was nothing of detail around him, not even the younger reaper. “Alan?” he asked into the darkness, hearing his voice echo. “Alan?!” he tried again, louder.

“I’m here.”

Spinning around, Eric was met with Alan but he stood a safe distance from Eric, making sure the blonde couldn’t reach out to grab him. “Al, hey, where are we? Why’s it so dark?”

Alan glanced around himself before he decided to step forward, reaching out one even paler hand to lie against Eric’s tanned cheek, smiling just a bit. “I didn’t want distractions for what I want to speak with you about.”

Eric frowned, brows knitting together in confusion. “Wha’ do ya want ta talk ta me about?”

“This.”

“This?”

Alan nodded, reaching up to poke at Eric’s temple with his other hand. “Your dreams.”

“Wha’ about my dreams?”

“They aren’t healthy.” He stepped back, dropping both arms to his side. “You’re obsession with trying to keep my alive. You know full well these are dreams and yet you force yourself to make reality the dream and this reality. I’m dead, Eric.” He rolled up his sleeves, showing Eric the prominent black veins underneath his pale skin. “You cannot change what fate I’ve been dealt.”

Eric shook his head, clenching his hands into tight balls. “Why can’t ya lie ta me and let me pretend and be happy?”

“If I did that, your happiness wouldn’t exist.”

“It would here!”

“And what of the real world? Am I just supposed to watch you go around with that ugly scowl on your face, hating the world for my mistake?”

The scowl Alan spoke off appeared on Eric’s lips, head snapping up to meet Alan’s eyes as his arms snatched out so his hands could grip tightly around Alan’s throat. “Just let me forget the damned reality out there! Lemme believe this is real!” his grip tightened as his eyes darkened. “This is where I want ta be! Where I want ta be happy!”

Alan placed his hands on Eric’s forearms, frowning at his partner. “You’re fooling yourself, Eric. This is all fake, a farce.”

“I don’t care if it’s all fake, it’s be real ta me!”

“Eric, you’ve lost your mind.”

He didn’t care as he continued to squeeze until before his eyes, all of what used to be Alan melted away leaving behind his skeletal frame in Alan’s suit. Eyes now wide, he shoved the skeleton back. “What the fuck did you do?!” The skeleton could say nothing without a tongue thus it lifted a boney finger to what should have been a blue sky. Following the finger, Eric found a large clock, both its hands stopped at 5:23. “…your time of death.”

“Yes. For you, time has stopped.”

Eric flicked his eyes back to the skeleton which was now Alan again. “H-How long have I been mourning?”

“I’ve shown you, Eric. My flesh does not exist anymore and my bones are almost gone as well.”

Eric stepped back from his partner at the realization of how much time he let pass him by. Suddenly, his head felt woozy and he collapsed to his knees, leaning on his arms with his bowed. “That’s…that’s too fuckin’ long. You haven’t been dead tha’ long.”

“Yes, I have been.”

Eric felt tears sting at the corner of his eyes and tried to squeeze his eyes shut to prevent them from slipping. “I…” he swallowed thickly, hands curling into fists again. “I don’t care. I just want you back.”

“I know you do.” Eric felt Alan’s arms wrap around him, similarly how he used to hug Alan to him. “But you have to let me go now. Any longer and I’m afraid you’ll drift further into insanity.”

A chocked sob escaped him as he felt Eric’s soft and gentle finger wipe a tear from his cheek. “No…I can’t.”

“You can.” Alan said laying his head on Eric’s shoulder. “I know you can, for me and you. I’m losing my energy trying to make you happy Eric. I must rest and you must carry on for me.”

“…when can I see ya again?”

Soft lips brushed the shell of his ear and Eric’s sight began to blur from the tears welling in his eyes. “In the end.” Alan assured, squeezing him gently. As his sight continued to blur, he could feel Alan’s presence slowly start to fade. “Now wake up…” and when Eric did open his eyes, he was alone with tears streaming down his cheeks which were soon followed by sobs as the clock started ticking again.


End file.
